If I know you, and you're reading this blog, you have two choices:

1) Feel free to pretend you haven't, should the contents be offensive, sensitive in nature, or just TMI (Too Much Information).
2) Comment freely or talk to me face to face, and be prepared for further honesty and opinions.

Okay? Okay.

Nov 11, 2008

And it goes on...

Hand washing dishes for 10. SEARS is coming to fix the dishwasher today. How long will it be until the needed parts arrive? The repair person is also coming to fix the washing machine - convenient that they both broke the same day- or perhaps a major pain in the ass?

He came, he went- the parts will be here on the 21st- he thinks. Lovely. Know how much laundry we'll have by then?? Last time this happened, in the middle of it all, we did 26 loads...

I have a long list of bloggers that I visit, when I can. In the last two weeks or so I have been so absorbed with the 8 campaign, all I can read is anything related to the Proposition. I've been missing all the funny and inspirational stories and writers and am getting a bit bogged down with the 8 talk- Yet, I can't seem to tear myself away.

A few people have expressed their condolences and said- "well, you can't win them all"- my response- "Yes, you can, oh yes, you can!"

I'm trying to move on here- but it consumes me. Facebook threads, blogs, newspaper articles, editorials, courage campaign, EQCA, Youtube... yes on 8 and no on 8 . I want to hear what they all say- both sides. I think it's an effort to understand where the yes on 8 folks are coming from. As much as I firmly believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, I am having a very different reaction to this. And in this case, I guess I'm willing to concede that certain people have religious beliefs that do not allow them to think outside the box. They are entrenched in their faith to the point that they are unable or unwilling to allow another point of view to be reasonable.

See, if we were talking about a proposition that was to amend the constitution, say Amendment 1- limiting the free exercise of religion. I think, perhaps, it would not pass. The religious folks would be all over taking away their constitutional rights.

But that is where the argument falls apart for me. Regardless of personal or religious beliefs- an amendment taking my rights away is wrong. Pure and simple. Yes on 8 was, and is, wrong. And I know I've said it before, but I cannot get over people in my community, in our school circle, people who know me, know my family, had Käri as their child's first grade teacher, who voted yes. I can forgive it- slowly. I can buy their religious excuses as the reason behind their vote. I can't or, admittedly, won't forget.

So I guess 8 is going to haunt me for a while. Feel free to shield your eyes.


velocibadgergirl said...

Have you seen this? I wish everyone who had the power to vote on 8 could've seen it before they voted.


gwendomama said...

having a hard time moving PAST it, personally - esp given this outlet of nablopomo (ie - diarrheaic typing)

sweatpantsmom said...

So disappointed and angry with my home state. Keep up the fight!

Bacchus said...

I'm with you... I'm not quite at the forgiving stage and will certainly never forget. We will win, not right away but we will win the right to protect our families.

Arial Ray said...

Today, I'm hand washing dishes for 28, so I can sympathize. The dishwasher in our child care centre decided to quit this morning and they won't be able to repair it until at least tomorrow.

Prop 8 has me down, too.

Tracey said...

Honey, I can't imagine having people vote to say that my marriage isn't "real". The word "injustice" doesn't do it JUSTICE.

I can't imagine you sailing through this without legitimate, serious pain.

I'm so sorry...

Anonymous said...

My mom disowned me when I came out of the closet a few months ago. It is against her religious beliefs to be gay. My sister voted yes on prop 8 and my soon to be ex put a vote yes on prop 8 sign on our front lawn. (We are still living separetley in the same house). So I understand. It sucks ass, but eventually we will win the fight. I can believe any other way.

Zip n Tizzy said...

I can't get over it either, and I felt very angry about having to vote on it. To me it is a civil right and should not be up for debate.

As per your washer and dishwasher... so sorry. I've been there and only with a family of 4. It sucks.
Put those older kids to work. That's all I can say.

Kathryn Martini said...

I'm with you. It's hard to let go (and I don't even live in CA.) I'm looking forward to the rally we're having in Portland this Saturday.

Anonymous said...

Just a couple of weeks ago, I had an interesting conversation with my in-laws (ages 70ish and both ultra religious). They both commented that they didn't see the hype about same-sex marriages as how could somebody get up in arms about two people being in love and wanting the same recognition and rights as those is heterosexual marriages. I was somewhat surprised at their acceptance and very, very pleased.

But then . . .

They followed it up with "So long as our kids don't view it as normal."


I was speechless.

I seriously couldn't formulate a response, but my face must have given my reaction away.

They attempted to justify their position to me and possibly clarify it a bit . . . "You know, it shouldn't be talked about at school." Wow, this was getting better all the time.

And then the kicker . . . "Some schools are even considering stocking books in their libraries with titles like Johnny has Two Daddies." The gall! How atrocious!

How could I possibly manage to change their perspective? And all I could come up with that they could possibly relate to, was this . . .

"Hmmm... kinda like how adoption once was secretive and not viewed as normal, huh? Kinda like how adoption was never talked about? Kinda like how people's feathers got ruffled when school libraries began carrying books with titles like Johnny has Two Mommies: a Birth Mom and an Adoptive Mom?"


(Note: 10 out of 11 of their grandkids are adopted.)

End of discussion. For the night at least.

The next morning though, grandma told me that it made them think and that I made a good point.

Hey, while I was not nearly as eloquent as you, and while two old folks in Idaho probably won't sway any vote, I just felt like sharing.

Whew . . . what was the point to all this? I'm not sure anymore. I agree . . . Yes on 8 was, and is, wrong. It sucks. Plain and simple.


Tricia said...


I was following your comments over at gwendomama and was wondering if something like this was going on. Good luck... Are you still writing?


Love seeing your name- wish you were still writing...

MommyLesli said...

I agree with you, taking away rights from people is wrong. But I do not think that religion gives anyone an excuse to do this. Christians who voted yes on 8 are hypocrites in my opinion.

As a former Christian, I know that Jesus would have never advocated this position. How can Christians claim that Jesus is on their side? Have they never read the Bible? Jesus was accepting of everyone, he didn't condemn people.

It really infuriates me that some people hold their religion out as an excuse for all sorts of discriminatory behavior. Religious leaders take advantage of their position and thus further more hypocrisy and hate. Some Christians realize how wrong this is, it's not all of them of course. There are plenty of Christians who embrace all people, regardless of sexual preference. So why do some of them persist in saying that marriage is only for heterosexuals? It's just so wrong for a majority of people to dictate what a minority has the right to do, that's why we've fought so hard to ensure equal rights for all!

Anonymous said...

It simply boggles my mind daily that it passed. I do not understand it....I never will and I won't try to either. I'm frustrated, upset and confused. Thinking of you daily!! Nicole :)

sarafoop said...

No civil rights movement in this country has ever failed. I feel sure that we are so close to tipping the balance on this one. I value your right to marry just as much as I do my own, and I know so many people who feel the same who are working for that right. We will prevail!