If I know you, and you're reading this blog, you have two choices:

1) Feel free to pretend you haven't, should the contents be offensive, sensitive in nature, or just TMI (Too Much Information).
2) Comment freely or talk to me face to face, and be prepared for further honesty and opinions.

Okay? Okay.

Apr 23, 2007


"So don't be surprised Mama, when you wake up tomorrow, and there is a horse in the house"

"I wished it for Mia"

Well, of course! With Gracie in charge, anything is possible.

Apr 18, 2007

Right Wing Thinking

Dear Anonymous,

We are blessed with a beautiful family. Most of our children came from foster care. I am thankful for their lives and cannot imagine how we got to be so lucky.

Jack is #6 from his birth mother and at least that from his birth father- as far as we know. All of his birth siblings are involved in the foster care system.

Mia and Abe are #5 and #6 from their birth mother. I don't know the birth father's information. Two of their birth siblings are adopted by a relative. One of them was diagnosed with mental retardation and autism. After much intervention, counseling and stability, the thought is that much of his issues are due to the abuse and neglect that he suffered and witnessed. The other has significant social issues. Of the other two, one is in long term foster care, deemed "unadoptable". And the oldest is living with a relative after his long term foster care situation could no longer tolerate the killing of animals and fire setting. We know he was the victim of sexual abuse before the age of three. All six of these children witnessed drug abuse and were exposed to multiple drugs, instability, filth, hunger, domestic violence, etc.

Julia is also #6. The other five birth siblings have been placed in the care of a relative, whom CPS and State Adoptions claims is "marginal". We are aware that the birth parents have tried to abduct them at least once and the police were called. There is a long history of drug use by both birth parents. We have heard that mom is pregnant with #7.

Ruby is # 1. Her birth mother was seventeen when she gave birth. There was no prenatal care, she was homeless, and disclosed i.v. methamphetamine use daily during pregnancy as well as alcohol, marijuana, and nicotine. We have been told her birth father resides in Mexico. Ruby was also born with a very rare metabolic disorder that can kill her if not properly managed- and even then could kill her. Her birth mother and father are carriers for this disease, it is a genetic disorder. The birth parents are unaware of this due to birth mother's addiction and subsequent disappearance.

Each adoption is weighed with sadness. Sadness for the child, sadness for the birth parents.

Each birth mother is under the age of 32. Only one is unable to have more children.

I worked with children, ages 5-12, in a residential treatment center. These kids were placed in a treatment center because they were unable to remain in foster care due to their extreme behaviors. Fire setters, sexual offenders (yes, at age 5), violence towards others, suicidal, runners, etc. Each child had a horrific history filled with details to difficult to imagine. I cannot remember exact numbers anymore, but these children had been through multiple, multiple, foster placements.

Here's where I come from.

Some of these children survive, many do not. And of those that do- a hugely significant amount of them establish the same patterns of their birth parents and the cycle is repeated.

You, I assume, are one that has "made it". I admire and respect that. Truly. I hope that you, your sib's, and mother are well.

I do not wish that you, or your siblings, were not born.



Apr 17, 2007

80's Yesterday!

'Cuz nothing says 80 degrees like a turtleneck!

Just rocking in the sunshine...

It is another

I wandered around the bloglands in my attempt to catch up on those I keep tabs on, and happened upon this Meme. The unknown from the relatively unknown (whose writing I happen to admire very much), made me curious, a challenge of sorts, so I had to do it, of course. It's roots start with Mr. Fabulous

Questions from Cole:

1. Who was the best sex you ever had and why?

Hmmmmm...Well...I'm such a fuddy duddy, I'd truly have to say the wife. There were a few folks before, but she's the one. Why? well, because she's the one...

2. Given a choice between sleeping in late or getting up early to do something fun..which would it be?

No question. Sleep In! I absolutely love to sleep in in the morning. I swear my best sleep time is from 4am to 10 am! But, I would want a real sleep in. Not the, everybody is up and everywhere making noise and I doze on and off for a few and then get up at 8, kind of sleep in.

3. Your math skills leave something to be desired...4 +4 =10? Keeping that in mind, did you do your own taxes this year or do you have them professionally done and do you save it for the last moment (like me!) or are you done months in advance?

I have no income so I do not do my own taxes, however, I do do Kärin's, therefore our taxes. Since we are living in sin, we have to file separately. I use Turbo Tax. This year I filed a month or so in advance- I try not to wait for the last minute.

4. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?

I have always wanted to live in Mexico- go figure. I've never even been. How sad is that? We've considered Canada simply due to politics.

5. Some laws in our country suck the big green wienie...which would you change and how would it affect you personally, our country and the world?

Oh my. First? In light of recent events (and too many past ones). Gun control or really just get rid of the damn things. I don't want them to be controlled really, just abolish them except for law enforcement, perhaps.
Then there are all the gay and lesbian issues. Gay marriage. Equal rights.
Can I make new laws? This could really go on and on. Foster care, mandatory sterilization for parents whose parental rights have been terminated for a child... (Yes, I know this is way right wing thinking and the ACLU would never stand for it, but I still think it should happen- there are plenty of children in the foster care system that these folks -fathers too- can raise once they are clean and sober...). I'll stop now.

So, if you want to keep this going…follow the instructions below and make a comment and ask to be interviewed and I will come up with something to ask you.

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your weblog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Apr 13, 2007

Three Things Meme

Three Things That Scare Me:
1. Heights
2. Intrusive thoughts of members of my family getting hurt/maimed/lost
3. Dying before my children are grown

Three People Who Make Me Laugh:(blogatopia community)
1. sweapantsmom
2. Friday Playdate
3. threekidcircus

I took this rather seriously and had to try to find three of the consistently funniest ...and therefore discovered, while many blogs I read and love have funny components, they are really more about day to day stuff, and it's not all comedy.

Three Things I Love:
1. My wife
2. My kids
3. To sleep... or eat

Three Things I Hate:
1. Tuna- but I like the smell(no need for jokes here Kerri, Stacy or anybody else...)
2. Mean people
3. Cleaning the urine off the floor around the toilet after my boys leave it for me

Three Things I Don’t Understand:
1. Mean people
2. God
3. Bigotry

Three Things On My Desk:
1. Piles
2. Kids computer
3. Kids computer games (guess I don't really have a desk, huh?)

Three Things I’m Doing Right Now:
1. Thinking about cleaning up from dinner
2. Procrastinating
3. Entertaining Julia

Three Things I Want To Do Before I Die:
2. Watch my children grow old
3. Have money in the bank

Three Things I Can Do:
1. Multitask
2. Sit quietly
3. Take care of people/pets/plant

Three Things I Can’t Do:
1. Say no to another baby/puppy/chick/giraffe...
2. Sail a boat
3. Snow ski

Three Things I Think You Should Listen To:
1. Music, lots of music
2. Impeach Bush messages
3. Your heart and gut (I know sappy, but true)

Things You Should Never Listen To:
1. Bush
2. Hate
3. "You can't"

Three Things I’d Like To Learn:
1. To Knit ( I've started two sweaters- finished none)
2. To play the guitar
3. How to customize my blog

Three Favorite Foods:
1. Ice Cream
2. Garlic Bread
3. My mother's enchiladas

Three Shows I Watched As A Kid:
1. Love Boat
3. Fantasy Island

Three Things I Regret:
1. Not buying the VW camper bus, getting a dog, and driving wherever before going to college
2. Screaming at my kids...everytime...
3. I guess it's a good thing I can't think of a third

This was harder than I thought.

Thanks Sandy!

And in the spirit of the meme

Three people I tag
1. Four Hearts Tru Love
2. The Good Enough Mother
3. Toady Joe

P.S. Computer is back, sickness is getting better...I have a lot of catching up to do.

Apr 5, 2007

Computer Blues

It broke last Tuesday, was supposed to be fixed by Monday and now they say Friday! Arghhhhhhhh!!!

I very much miss the laptop and the connection to the outside world, google, blogs... Maybe tomorrow.