I find it funny-meaning odd- that we are such a mystery. Over and over again people are confused by our relationship. Sometimes it is pure curiosity- and I don't mind answering questions- truly I don't. And then there are other times when people just don't take a minute to think. And for those who can't stand the thought of imagining us living a normal completely non-alternative lifestyle, because the idea of two women in bed together makes you sick to your stomach, don't imagine it. I don't imagine you.
Somehow we find ourselves in situations where we appear to be educating folks. This is our family. This is who we are.
If you have had a partner for a significant amount of time, guess what? We argue about the same things, talk about the same things and do, pretty much the same things. If you have children, we face the same challenges, dilemmas, and good times.
We wish we had more time for ourselves and that the kids behaved better, sometimes, and that we had more money.
Thankfully, we have rarely been in hurtful, discriminatory, circumstances. Generally, people seem to make these comments behind our backs. Occasionally, we hear them through friends. There was the one time that we were blasted by a local paper. The article accused us of being a "well connected lesbian couple" (connected to who, I kept wondering...gas company, water company???) who were "stealing another family's children". That was fun.
Our home is not decorated with Melissa Etheridge posters. We watch the same t.v. shows. And go to bed early whenever possible, because with eight kids, we are always tired.
Our kids are essentially normal. Just like us.
But, if there are questions, let me know.
Edited 5/5/07
I started this, ironically enough, on my parents 48th wedding anniversary, a few weeks back. Not sure where it came from, but there it is. I wonder, a lot, how life would be different if gay and lesbian relationships were give official recognition and people would just get their heads out of their asses. Why are more people concerned with my marriage and how it is eroding heterosexual marriage (the divorce rate is so low, right?) than our lying, cheating, law breaking, president?
And now it is time for making some tacos and burritos for dinner. It is Cinco de Mayo, don't ya know?
May 5, 2007
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3 comments:
I'll be brave and toss out a question . . . how is it that you and your partner were both in heterosexual relationships (of some sort I'm assuming, since you both previously had biological children) eventually came to discover that you were in fact homosexual?
I'm warning you though . . . you may not want to answer my question. Answer a question from me, and another will follow, and another, and another. I'm a very curious (my husband preferred to call me "nosey" . . . how rude) person and exceptionally interested in others' lives (to a fault).
You've got my respect and admiration, and your sexual orientation makes no effin' difference to me!
Sandy.
Sandy, I could give you the short version, or the long...
Think I'll go long.
Part one is now posted.
I have to laugh; a lesbian couple was the furthest thing from my mind when you mentioned "Alternative Lifestyle". Living completely and utterly off the grid, growing all your own, bartering instead of purchasing; living in a pyramid instead of a house; living in an RV instead of a stick-n-brick; there are a myriad of lifestyles I would consider "Alternative", but for me, a lesbian couple is right as rain, normal as baseball, not the least bit Alternative. You owe no more explanations than Jamie and I do. :)
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